Dear friends,
I am finally home from the hospital! I was there much longer than I thought I would be. I hope you will continue to read my blog! I hope you were able to maybe read some of the archived posts you may have missed, and I promise I will start posting new material very soon! I have a lot of things I need to catch up on, and due to the fact that I'm not exactly young any more my healing has come a bit slower also! Please continue to read, laugh, and comment! And if you have anything you would like to share, please drop me an email and I would love to post it! I totally enjoy making people smile and I have many funny things I have yet to post! See ya all real soon! And also a special welcome to my new followers! Read, enjoy, comment and giggle!
Love, janene!

Sometimes the cure may be worse than the disease. This may be the case for a hemroid cream from Japan. The use instructions on the  Japanese hemroid cream, "POSCOOL" read, "Lie down on bed and slowly up the projected portion like a sword-guard into anal duct. While inserting POSCOOL for approximately 5minutes, KEEP QUIET,"  That is exactly how it reads, bad grammar and all! Are we to assume it it so painful we will want to scream instead of, "keep quiet" or are hemroid suffering people of Japan supposed to keep it secret?

janene

Since the 1970's women have been protesting for equality. Evidently some states have failed miserably, and still treat women as "second class" citizens. One such state is Tennessee! In the city of Memphis, Tennessee it is illegal for a woman to drive a car,unless there is a man either running or walking in front of the moving vehicle waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians. Although I see quite a few female idiot drivers on the streets  I still think this law is horribly wrong! I have seen bad male drivers too! Women of Memphis unite, show those stupidly misguided jerks that we females are a force to be reconned with! 

janene

Being a mom and having sick babies at times, I had to take their temperature. I never needed to take their temperature rectally, but if I had, I'm sure I would have kept a separate thermometer for that use only. And I'm positive I would sterilize it between use. But maybe that is just me! To help those people who aren't as germ phobic as I am, the electric thermometer manufacturer has added this warning in hopes that these non phobic people will at least follow instructions. "Do not use orally after using rectally!"

janene

Here are a few more silly signs. Enjoy, I did.

janene

Some warning labels you know are in place because some idiot has done something, well, IDIOTIC, and sued a company and won. My guess is that is what happened to "Apple". In the instruction manual that accompanies the "Ipod" shuffle is this little gem, "DO NOT EAT IPOD SHUFFLE" People, really! Apple's aren't always edible!

janene

English. A language you hear in just about every corner of the world. But sometimes the translation isn't quite right! A sign inside a Tokyo taxi reads, "Please fasten seatbelt to prepare for crash." And this sign in a Tokyo park reads, "KEEP JAPAN CLEAN DON'T BURN THE FIRE CHIEF". And this warning label is on a set of Korean knives,"WARNING!:KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN". On a package containing a shower cap at a hotel in Japan says, "fits one head." I wonder who that one person is! But one of my favorites is the sign hanging inside a public bathroom in China,(see picture) I can only assume they think tourists are so dumb they need instructions for the toilet!

janene

Summer. The fun times riding your personal watercraft at high speed jumping waves and cooling off! If complete cleansing of you body cavities with dirty lake, river, or sea water isn't part of your plans, best wear protection other than sunscreen! This warning appears on Jet Ski personal water crafts, "Wear wet suits to protect against abrasions, hypothermia, and injuries to orifices (rectum and vagina) from impact with water surface." 

janene

Remember eating those cute little crackers shaped like animals? The fun little box shaped like a circus train! Well animal rights activists have even managed to make even innocent bakers of these little crackers post a disclaimer on their box. "No animals were harmed during the manufacture of this product!" Duh! They only LOOK like animals!

janene

How many of us actually read the care instructions on our clothes? I hardly ever do. I think its good enough if I keep my colors and whites separated. But I think after finding these little gems I may pay closer attention! I just wish I knew why you wouldn't be able to use their shorts for sumo wrestling, and why a college students Jersey says basically, "You are a college student, but are dumb as a post, have mom do your laundry!" Uh, if they can drive, they can wash their own clothes!

janene

Some men, for reasons I just can't fathom enjoy dressing in well...dresses! But if they decide to stroll down a sidewalk in Miami, Florida "dressed" up, they better make sure their dress has straps! A Miami city ordinance states, "No male is to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless dress or gown." So I guess if your dudedress has straps stroll down those streets of Miami with what is left of your pride!

janene

While researching stupid warning labels I found these innocent products with not so innocent names! When naming your product you should make sure it actually described the product. Here are some very funny examples of names gone wrong! 

janene